- Don't compete with others
Because you will never win
Don't compete with yourselves
Because you are never good enough
Compete with time
Because when it's gone
It's gone for good -
I am turning 22 in just a couple of days. It's always the perfect time to make reflections and jot down what are my New Year/ Birthday resolutions, plans and goals. I have never been into this kind of stuffs before because I reckoned I always failed [read: procrastination]. In the past, my life was just going with the flows. I took whichever paths that seemed convenient to me. I did not really have any strong determinations to reach certain points at my life. There were times when I thought of life and promised to get myself there, but when the morning came I lost all the persistence I ever needed.
Well, I'd be lying if I say I do not have any proud moments so far. Probably, studying abroad is one on my top lists. As some of you may have already known, I lived by myself since I was 14 and pursued my study abroad when I was 15 y.o. A little something here, I was always known as a shy and timid girl back then. I knew it and I wanted to change that so I begged my parents to send me abroad. I was very fortunate to have my parents' trusts and supports on me. Most of my relatives, friends and neighbors could not believe that the "Jessy in their perception" would go out there all alone. At the age of 17, I felt very proud of myself but it was still not enough. I wanted more challenges in life. I had an opportunity to continue my study at Hong Kong so I took it. Long story short, it only lasted for a year and I gave up.
Now you see, human nature will never get you satisfied because there is always more.
"Some infinities are bigger than other infinities". It's the same concept when competing with others. It's good to have idols or someone you look up to in your life, use them as your inspirations not as your comparison. I realize our society has just gotten worse day by day. Social media is controlling our benchmark, telling us what is good and what is not and where we belong. The more followers, likes, retweets, comments etc you have, the better person they are. But hey, you know what those people on top might not even care about that, they are paying more details and attentions on what they are actually doing. And of course, hard works will eventually pay off.
Meanwhile, you are running out of time before you even realize. I was so caught up with people's opinions on what they might think of me if I do this and that. I wanted to be good, to look good. The worst part was I did not want people to see that I was in crack. I have had regrets for not grabbing more opportunities when I was still a student and more commitments into something I genuinely loved. But yea, regret is pointless and wasting time. It's better to find a way to move on and to fix things up.
Now that I have come to the fifth paragraph, I swear I did not actually plan to make this looks like an essay but it actually looks like one. So whatever and anyway ... Focus on things you genuinely love and pour your heart and commitments on it. Without you even realizing it, you are halfway there already.
xx, Jessy
All pictures are copyrighted by aB Photography
